You're probably like most people and already know what psychological safety is.

You've heard the definition, seen the research, and maybe even talked about it in training — it seems like this term is popping up everywhere in the workplace. And most leaders I speak to genuinely want their teams to feel safe. They want them to ask questions, challenge decisions, and admit mistakes without fear.

So, if everyone is talking about psychological safety, and leaders are backing it, why does it seem like it's still lacking in most teams?

It's because the real barrier isn't a lack of knowledge; it's something much more human: impression management.

Why Impression Management Matters More Than We Think

If you've ever wondered why people stay quiet even in "safe" environments, this is often the reason. It's not always fear that holds people back. Sometimes, it's a careful calculation.

People don't just want to feel safe; they want to look competent. In environments where performance rules and speed matters, image can become the top priority.

That's when teams start to veer away from learning mode to protection mode, mistakes get buried, concerns go unspoken, and silence becomes the norm, not because people don't care, but because they're carefully managing how they show up.

So, what exactly is impression management, and how does it show up in the way we work?

Where It All Began: Goffman and the Human Instinct to Perform

Impression management is the instinct to shape how others perceive us. It's not necessarily malicious, it's just deeply human. In fact, most of us have been doing it since childhood. We learn what makes us look capable, likable, competent, or in control… and we lean into those behaviours.

This idea isn't new. Sociologist Erving Goffman coined the term in the 1950s, describing everyday life like a stage: when we're "front stage," we perform and try to make the best possible impression. When we're "backstage," we let our guard down and act more like ourselves. Work, of course, is almost always front stage.

And that's where it gets tricky. Because in high-performing workplaces, people don't just want to do the right thing — they want to look like they're doing the right thing.

That's when impression management becomes a barrier. It shows up in all kinds of ways, like:

• Not asking a question in a meeting because you're afraid it'll sound dumb

• Nodding in agreement even when you don't really understand

• Downplaying a mistake

• Over-preparing before you speak so you look polished

• Embellishing or overstating an achievement

Essentially, it’s the decision to prioritize how you'll be seen over what needs to be said. And when protecting your image matters more than voicing a risk, asking for help, or learning out loud, it starts to chip away at the very conditions that make a team strong.

So, Is All Impression Management Bad?

No, of course not. We all want to be seen in a good light. The goal here isn't to eliminate impression management but to recognize when it starts running the show.

It's one thing to prepare and another to perform. One supports clarity while the other protects ego. And if we're serious about building psychological safety, we have to know the difference.

Leaders: Most at Risk, Most Accountable

Leaders aren't immune to this. If anything, they're more susceptible. The higher you go, the more people are watching. It's in these senior roles that the stakes feel bigger, and so does the temptation to protect your image.

But that's also why leadership behaviour matters most. If you say nothing when a problem comes up, your silence speaks volumes. If you only share polished ideas, people stop bringing you the messy ones.

Your example sets the tone: is this a team where performance is everything? Or a team where people can be real?

Try this: Think about the last time you changed your mind based on feedback from someone more junior. What did you do? What signal did it send?

Breaking the Cycle

Here are two ways leaders can reduce impression management and create space for honesty, learning, and trust (otherwise known as psychological safety):

1. Normalize Intelligent Failure

Dr. Amy Edmondson is a professor at Harvard Business School and one of the world's leading experts on psychological safety. Her research has helped organizations around the world understand what makes teams thrive and what holds them back.

One of her most useful contributions, in my opinion, is the concept of "intelligent failure." It's the kind of mistake we want to see more of. Not sloppy errors or repeated oversights, but thoughtful, well-intentioned risks that didn't pan out.

According to Edmondson, intelligent failures have a few key characteristics:

• They happen in new territory — situations where we haven't done this before

• They're opportunity-driven — there's a real upside if it works

• They're informed by what we already know — not just guesses

• They're small in scale — we don't bet everything on one outcome

• And they leave behind something we can learn from — even if we don't succeed

So when someone on your team takes a smart risk, and it doesn't work out, the goal isn't to downplay it or sweep it under the rug. The goal is to acknowledge the effort, learn from it, and signal that this kind of risk-taking is part of how we improve.

Ask questions like:

• "What did we learn from that?"

• "What might we try differently next time?"

• "What did this surface that we wouldn't have seen otherwise?"

Over time, responses like that change the culture because they tell people that failure isn't fatal, it's part of the work, and more importantly, it's safe to be seen making the attempt.

2. Actually Invite Input 

Part of most leadership scripts include a concluding "Any questions?" at the end of a presentation or instructions, but that isn't enough. It creates space in theory but not in practice. Instead, leaders need to:

• Ask specific people what they think

• Rotate who speaks first in meetings

• Use questions like "What are we missing?" or "Does anyone see it differently?"

• Leave silence after you ask, even when it feels awkward

And here's the big one: Pay special attention to junior team members.

They're often the ones most hesitant to speak up, not because they don't have something to say, but because they're trying to manage how they're seen. The fear of sounding like a know-it-all, being wrong, or stepping out of line is very real. Many have been belittled before for doing exactly that.

So, as a leader, it's not enough to open the floor. You need to make it clear that everyone — regardless of title, tenure, or experience — is meant to be part of the conversation.

And when someone speaks up, especially someone more junior, show them it matters. Ask a follow-up, take notes, and revisit their point later.

Less Polished, More Real

If you take anything away from this blog, let it be that the cost of hiding is high. It slows down decisions, dissolves trust, and robs teams of the very insights (and opportunities) they need to grow.

We need to work toward an environment where each time someone admits they're unsure, asks for help, or points out a blind spot (and they're met with curiosity instead of critique), that's a win. And the more that happens, the easier it gets.

That's how we build teams where people stop performing and start participating. Where psychological safety isn't just a value, it's a practice.